Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
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