come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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