i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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