Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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