they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
