it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
