My room smells like vodka and shame
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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