Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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