i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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