Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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