Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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