i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
