you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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