how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
