Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize