the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
