He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Randomize
