He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize