party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
