i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
