Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
When did angry sex become our thing?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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