I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
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