i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
