I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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