Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
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