quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize