is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
