Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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