another moral hangover. fuck.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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