my sisters under your porch take her home
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize