It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
