508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
So much Jack, so little girl.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
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