i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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