the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Randomize
