from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
