You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
