I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
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