I feel like I'm in dance class right now
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
