apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
