honey bunches of taint.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
