people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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