sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
