was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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