**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
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