doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
this just has baby written all over it
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
