I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
