do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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