He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
