I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
