and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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